Where it Shouldn't

Such an angry bitter
person that being a bitch isn't
a facade like you make
it out to be, it's
actually the real you.

Your love and flattery
prove themselves not
to be so in all
the little things you do.

What is it that
makes you want to be on a
collision course to
heartache while playing
both sides?

Is it you or your old
bitch of a has been
secret that always
works it so that he
stays in shadows
and hides?

Is this five minutes
of fame worth it,
did you score the
most dope you'd
ever seen?

Or is true
love touching you
where it shouldn't making
you have to fight
yourself not
to come clean

Just how you have wanted
it all with me then you
have to reveal it all
to me to come out on top.

This farce of a romance
they created to add
more drama reached inside
your heart and for
us will never stop.

You must be certain
that the truth between
us would make this love
between us no
longer exist.

Search your heart and soul,
because the truth
that would destroy us
is the same truth
now that allows
our love eternally
persist.

I'm not special...

Priceless catatonic
episodes keep me
from saving face in
your presence.

Lifeless and
moronic geniuses seek
to see my demon
emerge with
acceptance.

I put on
lay-a-way salvation
because I'm not special
and nothing good
ever happens to me.

I changed my
order to damnation when
I realized purchase
power won't
set me free.

The guardians of the
rules raised our
threat level to
Defcon-4 so that the
extermination could begin.

Most dimensions
have no
condiments available
in hopes that
they would see
the jumpers again.

Mercy was sold
out at every
store we went to and
now hope
is sick with
a stomach flu.

I wanted to believe
but cried
when I began to
see down the path
to what
is true.

They knew gang stalking
won't be proved and
how to end me
without a fuss.

My heart, my Alexis Michelle,
they've taken your
Daddy's life away
from the both of us.

Being a Mistake

Stolen passages were
tainted by the kiss asses
who just want something.

I saw the beauty
in Madness, a calamity
Jane too busy frontin'.

My color blindness makes
it impossible to see your
rainbowed mind due to
multiple personality disorder.

A tyranny sprang
forth while injustice
became deceivingly
the sequential order.

Sprinkle all your stares
at me as if I could
give a fuck if
you care or whether
you approve or not.

One more feather
on this camel's back will
make me a
mass murderer and you
being one of the
ones who was shot.

The main course
made me have an
appetite for speed.

It landed down
in the best place
for me to bleed.

Roughed up my mind so
that I could handle
more rejection from
a fine bitch
like you.

I was in a panic
because I'm worried that
me being a mistake
is what's left
to be true.

unable to stand

i sit in the space near the very bottom of life wondering if you can hear me tonight

God almost everything is gone and I walk in darkness unable to see the light

i have come so far and tried so hard still I am watching my life fall apart

only you know the truth behind the mask and the beauty within my heart

friends and lovers turned away and spit in my face as if I were a monster too horrible to see

things I treasured, even my home are now being taken from me

no one to talk to, even worse only tears I have to say

how did it ever wind up that my demise would come so quickly and happen this way

i spent a lifetime against the wind with my fists held high into the air

it seems the moment I let them down is when they cast their blade upon me without a care

the ones i gave my love just laughed while gnawing on my bloody heart in the vampire's feast

if you can hear me God I need you before my life becomes any more worthless and I am deceased

at the end of a rope like a miner whos just had the bottom of the cavern cave in

like a repentant sinner who has been told there is no penance for a sinner like him

left in judgement past the drainhole and below the sewage of the dammned

i find myself bleeding, broken and i am no longer able to stand