alone against the wall

topless rhetoric spun across the stage to a beat that evoked the pain of truth in me


faultless toxicity runs through my open wounds for everyone to see


abominated and abound by the chosen jest that was so easily handed down again in that instant replay


lost in the mix I wonder exactly what it is that I'm suppose to say


everybody wants a fuckin' piece of the emotional pie, uncaring if I'm left with none


it seems it's all come down to gestures of love in vane, leaving the game without one


bellowed out a miserable rhapsody as the choir joined in to place a bet on the term harmonized


blood flows freely from the veins that should have been removed or cauterized


the romantic tragedy packs a powerful punch just past the punch line


addiction maddened by such insidious lies to the final crime


alone against the wall


this bullshit was my call


tonight I'll cry into the darkness and see past every part of this


my strength is made perfect in my own defiant weakness


so journey back from where you came and fly away


nothing left to prove, your lies are all that's left to say

the soft kiss

it is time to say goodbye, it is time for the end


no more happiness found now that I am free of sin


it's a lonely walk down an empty street, I can't seem to care


when I reach out my hand, no one is there


left to embellish the past with taunts of returning to the start


making war out of love became my perfected art


only bridges burned just beyond the insanity of yesterday


a voice shouting out that has nothing left to say


so much damage, so many battlefields with hearts left broken


so easily scoffed at the madness in the words I have spoken


the keys won't work on the door, my soul is out of business


my pain is so great that my damnation is listless


only a few more steps to a journey of finality


the soft kiss of death is all that's left for me

soliloquies in solitude

we cross the t's and dot the i's


but in seductive darkness we realize


there's something unsaid, something unforgiven


something dead amidst what we now live in


taking it's toll while bringing out the worst


soliloquies in solitude to which we are cursed


embracing the anthem of a foreign march to the tide


stumbled down into frigid waters as in you I died


a burden too heavy and a weight too strong


nightmares made political by such a meaningless song


fallen to the truest catalyst for a martyr's blame


empowered through poverty stripping me to no shame


gone, oh long gone yesterday, the twilight of an ember


the pacesetter for a tomorrow is what I try to remember

Touch my Hand Little Princess

Hold tight to the truth and speak upon the wind


So that I may awaken from the depths of hell I live in


Touch my hand little princess, give me the gift of your presence


So long I slept, spun along the skies by your essence


The keeper of life shows me a sign of heaven in your eyes


Every sacred moment you offer up to me a new surprise


Yesterday lost to madness I could not see beyond the night


But you were here with me, though I was blinded to sight


My beloved, my little lady who whispers a dream come true


Innocence cherished in the light I see in you


At an arms length I stay only to keep you safe from the horror show


You're the reason for any goodness that may be left for me to know


I love you baby girl, just learn one thing if you can from a broken man like me


that I'm the perfect example of who you don't want to be

fear relapse

there is a chill in the air

love left lonely somewhere

tonight the curtain calls

fear relapse as a tear falls

burdened insanity by repetitious results

nailed upon the cross by your insults

caressing pain of such a waste

try to swallow without the taste

staring at the darkness within

where the ending has to begin

loosened breath is where we die

can't face truth in another lie

perfected pain such a mystery

strengthens to write a new history

always another bend in the road

out there another heart turns cold

that is searching to finally see

the beautiful darkness in me

playing with the shadows

paper glass shredded the elasticity of a dream for something more

yesterday's memory left a package at the back door

my true love, you made me out to be nothing but a joke

putting me on hold, in the darkness, after each time we spoke

the beast is broken by the mystery of the night

facilitation of anger against nothing left to fight

and to the hypocrite who calls my angel your number one

keep your let downs because you treat her as if she were none

an embarrassment to nothing because that’s all I ever was

they say playing with the shadows is all he ever does

what you gave me is what I have left to hold on to

distance with no end is all love put me through

an inadequate and emotionally impoverished soul

the pieces that never really fit into a whole

walking into the wind with nothing left to show

holding back the tears in the process of letting go

In Her Passing

A woman of strength who held us all together through the years

A woman who faced the challenges and stood up against her fears

So gentle, and so kind, she embodied so much I wished I could be

One light of God that will always shine down on you and me

Her loving touch, her patient ways, something we all could learn

She gave us so much love and never asked for anything in return

A gift from heaven manifested here on this earth for a short while

It was amazing to hear her laugh and to watch her smile

In the best of times and the worst of times she was always there

And even in our darkest hour she comforted our despair

To her, we could do no wrong and she always tried so hard to make a fit

And even when our hope was lost her smile was there in spite of it

She was the wind beneath so many wings

And in our hearts her song forever sings

In her passing nothing will ever be the same

But she would want us to smile every time we hear her name

07/01/10 –For Hazel Moody
By: Your Grandson (Billy Wilder)

The only part of Me

crawling in between the damned and the divine

sorrow left to weep at the grave of time

impugned with nothing less than hypocracy

eviscerated everything that was meant to be

a stolen moment without so much as a care

a hidden secret causing memories a scare

it was once written now a lingering lie

among the fallen wishing to be high

a common symptom to a problem that is in the mirror

with each day of distance it can't get any clearer

within my own thoughts there must be a compromise

within my own heart It's me I really despise

spoken upon the lips of whispering winds

in destitution there is only sins

there is no mystery, there is nothing to see

there is nothing here, it's the only part of me

Meant To Last

fine tuning the process of alienation allows life to be neglected

nauseated by the choices that are left to be selected

addiction screams loudly but I am the only one who can hear it

conviction makes a mockery in the fact that I fear it

rotting in decay is the promise that you once made

in the twilight of finality I watch the glitter fade

I once believed

now deceived

I was able to stand

only to be damned

incoherent ramblings describe the calls

the ravenous feed on my soul as the curtain falls

a karmic remedy of the witches brew

a memory that forgets what I once knew

holding on to the razor that cuts the pills

your kiss is the pain that so beautifully kills

your words a nightmare left for my eternity

your love was the end, the final death of me

now in a shell with the ghosts of a past

a curse of corruption that was meant to last

truth in my hell

it’s in the darkness just beyond the trees

where the truth of my heart lives and breathes

broken, damned and sentenced to the living

fallen behind with no chance to be one of the giving

a dark knight who holds his head low amidst his failing

a song that's darker than black comes from the wailing

it’s lonely here and I’m just a step beyond reach

stuck with the knowledge that nothing is left to teach

fighting a fight that isn’t worth fighting for

an angel of light left heartache at my door

the only sight left to see is the shadows of the past

the only breath left to breathe is the last

karma came and left me in tears with the bill

I’m the joke of tomorrow and my lover’s last kill

she was the saving grace that I lost along the way

the last smile was when she left me that day

this epic journey of what wasn’t to come

a tail of sadness at what is left undone

to who can read beyond what is before you

find the truth in my hell as I bid all adieu

Beyond My Lips

Up came an epiphany of grandeur in the soliloquy of my demise

Short lived after the past of bad blood presented its compromise

It spoke so sweetly while bearing the bad news

Like the sting of pleasure from the alcoholic sipping the booze

The demons in my head once arrested during a traffic stop

But now loose and on the run back to the top

Blood boils cold with my head to some doomsday prophecy

Alone inside finding comfort there’s nothing left of me

No song to sing

No pain to bring

No yesterday

No come what may

Fallen short of glory, left to the penance of the plain

Gone the extra mile to reach a face with no name

Eluding is the chance to avoid the cataclysm riding in on the storm

Embracing the darkness left in the broken promise of its truest form

It’s the plundering of loneliness during the madness of this eclipse

Though I speak into the silence, not a word is heard beyond my lips

The Aftermath

talented tongues have kept me waiting on truth that was stuffed in a biodegradable farce


so many of us wading in time, keeping a distance, now that love is preciously sparse


changed my order just to keep up with time remembering the night that we laid


I am just starting to feel my heart again after the years of devastation that I paid


broken by reality and how you couldn’t love us enough to give me a tomorrow


inundated by being misunderstood and hated by so many while grasping sorrow


an epic love of such proportion it took every piece of all the puzzles I had on the table


there is no fairytale ending, a love so great and a burning passion merely a fable


it makes me laugh, while watching the demons dance in nightmares I knew all along


condemned, damned and without you were the lyrics you would write to our song


sanity stolen by the eaters of the dead, yes the chosen few that speak on the walls


watching time rape the best of me as the sacred land within my heart falls